Nightmares
by sayrahsunshine
Summary: Y/N comes over to the Jaspar flat to film a video with Joe. She finds out that he hasn't been sleeping well recently and that it might be more than just bad dreams. (Joe Sugg x Reader imagine) (Minor adult language and situations)
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: This a Joe Sugg imagine. All events depicted are fictional. Y/N = Your Name

* * *

After a few tries, Y/N finally managed to unlock the front door. With a huff, she fell into the front room while juggling three, full plastic bags.

Caspar turned his attention to her from the TV screen when he heard her panting. The look of confusion on his face quickly morphed into a grin.

"Having trouble there, Y/N?" he chuckled.

She grimaced, setting down the bags on the table. "Don't get up and help or anything." She haphazardly took off her sneakers.

Caspar continued to laugh softly, turning back to his game, "Well, it's too late now."

Y/N massaged the cramps out of her hands as she walked over to the back of the couch. Lazily, she threw her arms around Caspar's neck and gave him a small peck on the cheek.

"Winning?"

"Yes," Caspar said quietly, his face scrunched, showing his forehead Wi-Fi symbol. "For now, at least."

Y/N chuckled, "Alright, I'll leave you to it. Is Joe all set up for our video?"

"Uhh, he should be. Last time I was downstairs he was setting up his camera."

She nodded her acknowledgement, even though Caspar wasn't paying any attention, and headed downstairs. A myriad of boxes towered around the staircase, making her sigh.

 _It's a shame really… I'll miss this place,_ she thought.

She spent a lot of time in this apartment after befriending the two boys and the rest of buttercream squad. Even though they weren't moving far, it really did feel as though a chapter of their lives were closing with the end date of the lease.

"Joe? You ready?" she asked, her bare feet slapping against the wooden steps. "I brought the props. They were heavy as shit."

She reached the end of the stairs and turned to go into Joe's room, "Still wish you would have hel-"

Y/N stood stock still in the door when she saw Joe.

He was curled up like a cat around his laptop on his bed, snoring softly.

"Oh." She smiled. _He must have starting editing while waiting on me_.

Slowly, she stepped closer to the bed and started moving the gadgets away from the sleeping ball. As she was starting to put things away, a small whimper made her stop in her tracks.

Y/N whipped her head toward Joe and frowned. He made another whimper and started twitching slightly.

 _Is he dreaming?_

His eyebrows furrowed and a deep frown pulled on his lips as his hands tightened into fists.

She sat down on the bed and carefully brushed a piece of hair from his face.

"No."

Y/N jumped slightly at the noise, thinking Joe might have woken up. But, his eyes were still squeezed shut, the tension on his forehead creating wrinkles.

"Please, don't."

Y/N's heart wrenched at the sound. She stroked his cheek softly and ran her fingers through the tips of his hair.

"Joe."

He twitched again.

"Joe, honey, wake up."

His breath caught and he whimpered.

"No, please… Leave her alone."

Her heart dropped again. She began shaking his shoulder gently. "Wake up, Joe."

"No. _No_! **_Don't_**!"

Joe woke with a gasp and his eyes shot open, staring right into Y/N's. His bright, blue eyes were so intense and crazed. She felt as though he was staring right through her. Gingerly, she stroked the creases between his furrowed eyebrows with her thumb, the other hand smoothing out his hair.

"It's okay. Everything's okay. It was just a dream, Joe."

Before she could even finish her sentence, Joe had launched himself at her. Arms wrapping around her waist and face nestled firmly in her neck, he held on tight. Shocked, Y/N froze, hands in the air. After a half second, she relaxed and held him close, rubbing small circles on his back.

"It was just a dream," she whispered. "Just a dream."

Joe continued to tremble and pant, trying his best to calm himself.

"It's alright. I've got you," Y/N hushed, "Just breathe."

Y/N couldn't have told you how long it took, but after a while, Joe's breathing started to even out and his grip on her relaxed.

He took one deep breath, held it and slowly exhaled. The warm air made the little baby hairs on Y/N's neck stand up right.

"Th-", he swallowed, trying to clear his dry throat. "Thank... you."

Y/N nestled her face closer and moved her hand to the back of his head.

"Any time."

There they stayed. The video forgotten.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: This is a Joe Sugg imagine. All events depicted are fictional. Y/N = Your Name

* * *

It had been about two weeks since Y/N had woken Joe up from his nightmare, and she couldn't help but feel as though something was off. The entire time after the incident, Joe had been avoiding her.

She'd denied it at first, but as the days dragged on, the lack of text messages and snapchats from her best friend started to become apparent.

Whenever she'd come over to help the boys pack up more things, he'd barely say more than a sentence to her. When Caspar and her would go out for food and invite Joe, he'd always opt out. When the lads and her planned a night out and met up at the club, she was shocked to hear that Joe was a no show and had cancelled last minute. That happened twice the first weekend. Once the second.

The next time they all went out, she decided to stay home to catch up on editing. But, she wasn't very productive after she received a snapchat from Jack, with an extremely confused face, with none other than Joe in the background laughing, circled in red.

Clearly something was up, but Y/N hadn't a clue. The boys stated that they didn't know either, and from what they could tell, he wasn't acting funny around them.

 _Have I done something wrong_ , is all she could think to herself as she drudged through the days.

Finally, she decided to take action. After getting home from a particularly long meeting, Y/N called him. She checked the time as it rang. _3:30. He shouldn't be busy._

"Hello?" Joe's voice filtered through after about five rings.

Part of Y/N hadn't even expected him to answer.

"Hey, Suggery. How's it going?" she replied, trying her best to sound chipper.

He, as it seemed, was not trying at all.

"I'm fine. Just doing some editing," he said, quietly. "What's up?"

 _Okay, that's it_.

"Joe, what's wrong?"

Silence.

Then finally… "Nothing's wrong. What you talking about?"

"Don't play that shit with me, Sugg. What's wrong?"

He sighed.

"Joe, I know something's wrong. You've been avoiding me."

"No, I haven-"

"Yes, you have."

Another sigh.

"Please, Joe," Y/N sighed. "If I've done something wrong, I'd like to know so I don't do it again."

"Y/N… You haven't done anything wrong."

"Then what is it then?"

"Let's not talk about it over the phone," he said. "Are you hungry? Want to grab some food?"

"Yeah," she replied. Anxious that she was actually going to get some answers. "Where do you want to go?"

"Let's do pizza."

After they sorted out where they were going to meet, Y/N grabbed her purse and headed out. Joe said he'd leave once he was finished with the vlog he was editing, so she knew she had enough time to walk the Thames by the little pizza shop they were going to.

It had been about 15 minutes of casually strolling when she had circled back around to the starting point in front of the pizza place. Sighing, she put both arms on the railing and looked out at the water.

She was worried. Joe never acted like this, especially not to her. She was afraid that she had done something wrong, and he just didn't want to tell her over the phone. She was afraid that by helping him through his bad dream, it made it painfully obvious the feelings she had for him. She was terrified that this might be the end of their friendship.

When it came down to it, she hadn't known Joe too terribly long. Only about a year and half. But, she had realized she was head over heels for that idiot about six months in.

At first she just blamed it on the fact that he was attractive and could make her laugh until her belly ached. Quickly she noticed that wasn't the case. Because the simple fact of the matter was she'd do anything for that man. He was her best friend and all he had to do was smile that goofy grin and it'd make her whole day.

She had never connected with anyone the way she had with him. And from the countless late night conversations they had, whether on the phone, sitting at the park or on his couch, the feeling was mutual. He'd told her that he didn't even tell Caspar or Zoe half the things he told her. With her, he always felt the most comfortable.

As time went on and Y/N took the chance to hope, Joe would come to her for 'love advice' whenever he'd meet a new girl. None of the relationships lasted. They were fleeting and none of them kept Joe's interest very long, but her hopes were still crushed. Because, if Joe had felt the same, he wouldn't have felt as though he had to go looking. He would have just come to her. But, as time had told, that wasn't the case.

So, she had accepted it. Y/N accepted that she was irrevocably in love with her best friend and there was shit all that she could do about it. But, no matter the amount of times she had to be his wing woman, help him choose an outfit for a date, or tell him when a girl was solely after his money, it was worth it to her to continue being his partner in crime. She couldn't imagine it any other way.

Y/N's ears perked at the sound of approaching footsteps from her left. It was Joe. She smiled at him as a feeling of contentment came over her. He weirdly had that effect on her. Sometimes she'd get butterflies whenever he looked at her with a lop-sided grin or if he walked around without a shirt on. But, for the most part, Joe always made her feel calm. Like everything was as it should be and she shouldn't have a care in the world.

Joe returned her smile but it didn't really reach his eyes.

The calm went away. Only to be slowly replaced by a creeping anxious feeling.

"Hey you," he said once he reached her. "You been waiting long?"

"No, not really," she said, turning back to the water. "I came a little earlier so I could walk around a bit."

He hummed in acknowledgement and stepped up to the railing, putting his arms against it.

Y/N chanced a glance and saw that Joe looked really pensive, staring at the water.

"Should have figured. You always do when we come here," he said, clasping both his hands together.

"Yeah. You tend to join me," she replied, quietly.

Joe nodded and stepped back from the railing. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I had to finish up."

Y/N followed suit. "No, I get it. Ready to eat?"

"Yeah, I'm starving."

Once they were all set up at the table and had ordered, Y/N leaned forward, chin resting in her hands, and looked at Joe expectantly.

"So...?" she started.

Joe swiped both hands down his face before leaning back against the cloth backing of the booth.

"So," Joe said "I'm sorry I've been avoiding you."

"That's a start."

"Shush," he tutted.

Y/N couldn't help but smirk.

"I'm sorry I've been avoiding you," he resumed. "Quite frankly, I don't have a good excuse for it. I've been thinking about how I should go about explaining myself but it all would come out sounding… weird."

Y/N's hands tensed into fists.

"So, I'm just going to try my best to say it plainly," he said, looking down at his hands as he traced the creases on the wooden table.

"Okay…" she almost whispered.

"Y/N, for the past month or so I've been having these reoccurring dreams, nightmares more rather, where you're taken, I can't get to you and all I can hear are your screams," he said softly, looking up at her. "It would wake me up in the middle of the night, multiple times. It would freak me out so badly, I'd always call or text you to make sure you're okay."

Y/N stared at him, slightly gob smacked, "I always thought you were drunk."

Joe shook his head, eyes back to the table, "No. I was never drunk." He started drumming his fingers against the wood, "Anyway. I've been trying to figure out ways to stop the dreams. You know, listen to music before bed, or watch a happy movie… Didn't work."

"But then a couple weeks ago when you woke me up, I was so… relieved that you were okay and right in front of me. And since then, the dreams have stopped," he said.

Y/N blinked, confused, "Well, that's a good thing, isn't it?"

Joe nodded, "Yeah, it is. But, I still haven't really been sleeping well."

"Why not?" she asked.

He sighed, "Because, a lot of the time I stay up thinking about what would happen if I actually did lose you…"

She was still confused, "Then why have you been avoiding me? Are you trying to distance yourself from me?"

His eyes snapped up to hers, "No. Not a chance."

"Then I don't understand," she hushed.

"I've…" he swallowed, casting his gaze down again, "I've just been scared, alright. I didn't know how to tell you this. I didn't want you to be weirded out."

Y/N almost forgot to breathe. He wasn't upset with her. She took a deep breath and exhaled.

"Joe, why would I be weirded out?" she chuckled softly. "You can tell me anything. Surely you know that?"

His eyes met her again with an almost timid gleam.

"And, hon, you're never going to lose me," Y/N reached over the table and grabbed his hand, stopping his drumming fingers. "Never, you hear?"

Joe didn't react at first, just stared at her hand on his. Then he laughed and looked back up at her. "You hear?"

A grin broke out onto her face, "Shut up. Don't make fun of my accent." She purposely overdid her southern twang.

"Yes ma'am," he said, a smile still pulling at his lips.

"Joe, whether you like it or not, you're stuck with me," she said, looking right into his eyes. "I'll even be there when that future lucky girl walks down the aisle to you."

Joe laughed again, the playful light back in his eyes.

"Shit, if I like her enough, maybe I'll be a bridesmaid," Y/N continued, laughing as she said it.

"No, that's hardly good enough," he quipped, taking a sip of his water.

"Alright, fine. I'll take Caspar's place and be best-woman. How about that?" she teased, so glad to see that smile back on his face.

Joe shook his head and looked at her, something unrecognizable in his eyes, "Still not good enough."

Before she could fully comprehend what he said, the server came and placed their large pizza in between them, causing them to let go of one another.

As the wheels in her head turned, she couldn't hear anything the server and Joe said to one another over the buzz of her mind.

Once the server left, Joe met her gaze again and smiled his smile.

"Well, go on," he pointed at the pizza, as he took a big bite of a slice.

"Tuck in. My treat."


	3. Chapter 3

The drive back to Joe's was quiet, both in their own little worlds in the back of the Uber. It wasn't uncomfortable, but Y/N had to admit that there was a tension in the air. Whether it was only on her side though, she couldn't tell.

She still couldn't wrap her head around what Joe had said at dinner.

 _Still not good enough._

Why wouldn't it be good enough?

That was the question that had been reverberating through her head the entire time they ate and even through the drinks they had after. She hadn't been able to figure out what he had meant by that and she hadn't gained the courage to ask him.

Before she could continue her line of thought, the car slid to a stop. After thanking the driver, they made their way up to the new flat. Once she stepped past the front door, she had to admit she was impressed. It was quite the upgrade from Caspar and his old place. Though, it didn't look lived in, regardless of the large sectional couch in the living room, and the shiny, gold dishware glittering through his glass kitchen cabinets.

"It's very…"

"Empty?"

"Minimalist," she turned to him, draping her jacket over the back of one of the kitchen bar stools. "Modern chic, even."

Joe let out a soft laugh, "Now you're just chatting shit." He moved to the counter, taking his wallet and keys out of his pockets. "Did you want to watch a movie or something?"

Y/N tracked the movement of his hands as he arranged his valuables on the corner of the worktop. Everything in their place.

"Um, sure," she responded.

He shot her a look, brow cocked and a small smirk gracing his lips, "We don't have to. Did you have something else in mind?"

Y/N's eyes snapped up to meet his gaze, "Huh?"

"You didn't hear a word I said, did you?" His baby blues glinted with amusement.

To put it plainly, she hadn't. Y/N was too preoccupied with observing him while she sifted through the asteroid field of thoughts that was her brain right now. Oh, wait. Was he talking to her again? Reality came back into sharp focus, only this time Joe was much closer than he had been before.

"Y/N?" His brows furrowed slightly in concern, his hand on her shoulder.

"What did you mean?" She hadn't meant to blurt that out. She felt her neck grow warm as she flushed in embarrassment.

"Wha- About the movie?" he asked, confused.

"No," she blinked. "At dinner."

She watched as his cheeks began to take on a pink tint.

"What did I say at dinner?" he asked, his hand dropping to his side.

Y/N's mouth pursed into a hard line, starting to get frustrated with him constantly evading her questions all day.

"Joseph."

His face was red now, his eyes burning holes into her feet.

She finally asked the question she had been wanting an answer to all night.

"Why wouldn't it be good enough, Joe?"

Slowly, he looked back at her. His blush was fading, but he was still visibly tense. His eyes slightly wide.

After what seemed like forever, he finally said, "How could it be?"

If Y/N hadn't been looking at him, she might have missed his hushed reply. That hadn't been what she was expecting.

"If not your best-woman, what part would you have me play in your future wedding then?" she responded, the pieces starting to slide together in her mind.

"You know what part."

"No, Joe. I don't," she retorted, frustration seeping back into her belly. "I can't read your mind! Please, speak plain- "

"I love you."

Those three words left his lips and her whole world stopped. Almost as though the very axis had been flipped.

After what felt like an eternity, he blinked. She let out a breath she hadn't even known she was holding.

"How long?"

"Honestly?"

She shot him a look.

"About a year."

"You… idiot," she breathed.

Unconsciously, he bit his lip. A nervous habit.

They simply stared at each other. The tension so palpable, the air so thick, it was as if they could almost see it strung between the two of them, quivering with the strain.

She licked her lips. His eyes dilated.

The string snapped.

The air rushed out from between them as Y/N wrapped her arms around Joe's neck, pulling him down, their lips crashing together. His arm snaked around her middle, pulling her tight against him. His lips were so soft. So warm. His hand held the back of her head, his fingers buried deep into her hair. She ran her nails down the back of his neck, pulling a growl out of him. _God, that sound._ He tugged on her hair. Y/N couldn't help but moan into his mouth.

She felt drunk. His taste. His touch. His scent. It was intoxicating. Y/N couldn't get enough. Her fingers seemed to be all over the place, trying their damndest to feel more. She wanted more. She needed it.

Her breath hitched as Joe hoisted her up, her legs immediately wrapped around his waist. He sat her down on the kitchen worktop, his hands running from her thighs to her hips, his lips and tongue leaving trails of heat down the side of her neck and to her collarbone. Her head lolled to the side, her hands grasping at his shoulder blades, her breathing short and shallow. She gasped his name.

He groaned softly, "You do not know how many times I've dreamt of you saying my name like that."

His kisses slowed then, coming back up to meet her lips. After a few pecks, he withdrew, staring into her eyes. His were so dilated they almost looked black. His hair was tousled. His lips red and puckered. His neck was peppered with red lines, evidence of where her nails had been. Perfection.

"I love you," she whispered.

It took him a second to comprehend what she had said. But once he did, there was no denying. His whole face lit up, sporting the biggest grin she had ever seen on him. And it was infectious.

Y/N laughed. She couldn't help it. She was just so damn happy.

Joe pulled her into a bone-crushing embrace, his own laughter rumbling from his chest through hers.

"I should have told you so much sooner," he said, muffled into her neck.

"Yes. You should have," she tutted.

He chuckled, pulling away enough to look at her.

"Well," his eyes shone as he flashed her a wolfish, lopsided grin. "I'll just have to make up for lost time."

She felt her breath catch in her throat at the sight. She gave him a cheeky grin of her own.

"Mm. Get to it then, boy."

He planned on it. She let out a squeal as he lifted her back up and marched them right into his bedroom, door slamming shut.


End file.
